Confessions of a Horrible Boss: Micromanage Him

'You better start thinking about the mouths you have at home, Johnson!'We don’t talk anymore. I feel so unwelcome and he seems so uncomfortable around me. It’s a tragedy, really. But that’s about to change. You see, I believe you diffuse conflict with greater exposure to others. And I’ve been told a good manager takes a personal interest in his reports. And that’s what I’m going to do. We’re going to spend more time together. We’re going to get to know each other real well.

I love details. And that’s why I’ll require more status reports. I want to document everything. I’ll spy on his arrivals and departures, lunch breaks, peer visits, bathroom breaks, and internet usage, just in case he misses deadline or quota. We’ll have regular meetings, where I can impart my wisdom and ensure policy and process is followed to the letter. Of course, I’ll want regular briefings to ensure nothing is missed.

Sure, I’m trying to push him out.

He knows it too.

But to everyone else, I’m just doing my job. I’m just being a manager.


Written by Jeff Schmitt

Reblogged via


Comments: I think Mr. Schmitt captures my experience with my Horrible Boss perfectly. These are exactly some of the vengeful situations I cope with on a daily basis. However, this 2014, the truth will be revealed.


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