Today, women often expect men to act like women – our culture has taught us to do this, and we don’t even question it. We expect men to be just like us – to think like us, to process emotions like us, to need to talk about their feelings like we do, to love words and emotional “connection” like we do, to want to sit face to face and talk for hours. We expect them to be like our close girlfriends.
Here’s some surprising news! Men aren’t like women. God made us to be very different. It’s good that we are different from each other. But we get ourselves into a lot of trouble when we assume that men think, process and feel like we do and that when they say or do things it would mean the same thing that we would mean if we did that thing. Did that make sense?
There are some similarities, of course. But there are many differences – and if we don’t understand those differences, we end up speaking a foreign language to men. We misunderstand them and they misunderstand us. That is frustrating! Our relationships work MUCH better when we understand men, allow them to be masculine and admire them for being masculine. The differences are what make relationships between men and women so magnetic!
As women, we LOVE words. Marriage counselor and author, Bob Grant, likes to say, “Words are for women.” We usually like to emote, talk, share, chat, email, text, talk on the phone and relate. That’s how we “connect” and feel close and loved with each other and with everyone in our lives.
The opposite of Bob Grant’s statement is also true – but most of us don’t realize it.
Words are not for men.
Men use words, of course. But words don’t have the same impact, meaning and power over men that they do for women emotionally – usually.
If you are ever in doubt about a man’s true feelings, trust his ACTIONS over his words. Ideally, they would both match up. But if they don’t match – his actions will tell you what he really thinks and feels.
WHY THE DIFFERENCES? (For those of you who are interested…
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