Jamaican Relationships: The Six Men To Avoid

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Relationships…. What can we say about relationships?

This is one topic that I know the content is never-ending. In campus, we used to have an open session to speak about relationships and there has not been a single day when our discussions have adequately ended.

The scope of relationships is so far and wide. Kate and I are going to be writing something about relationships and advice we have found useful in my own life, starting today and (hopefully)  every Wednesday.

Today, we start with some advice to the ladies on the kind of men to keep away from. Ladies, just because he looks like Johnny Bravo and has muscles, does not make him a good candidate to date. If you want to reduce the risk of heartbreak, do not go jumping into relationships with the following men:

The Money-Man

This man has money; he is accomplished and has made enough. He dresses in the best fashionable clothes and he drives the latest cars. The problem with him is not the fact that he is rich, the issue is that he thinks it is a gift to the world, because he has money.

He flaunts the cash around, sending the ladies money at every whim with the expectation that they will fall head over heels for him. He thinks that if he gives a lady some cash, she will love him. He will meet you, offer you a ride for two meters, then as you alight out of his Harrier, he will ask you to be his wife.

He does not mind buying you a car and paying for a house for you in an estate of your choice. Ladies, you need to avoid this man, because he is just after sex, he is already paying for it with the money that he is giving you. He may even give you the gift of an STD.  One day, he will demand to be paid back in full.

The Perfectionist

This man is probably the worst that you could ever meet. He keeps pointing out what things are wrong with you. Maybe your hair is out of line, the skirt you are wearing has creases, the accent you have does not impress him and the only time you are right is when you agree with him.

He has no mistakes, he is perfect, and he can never apologize for anything that he does, because he does everything right. If he at any time he hurts you (which he will), it is not his fault, but yours. You have to agree with his way of doing things, since he is the source of all wisdom.

You are just a sidekick in the relationship, so take your place and relax right there. He makes you feel unworthy and worthless of breathing the same air as he does, since you are imperfect and he is the epitome of the way should always be done.

The Nympho

The only thing on his mind is sex, how to have sex with you, after that, how to get you to bed again. That is all he is about. He does not think that he is shallow, which he is, and he thinks it is his God given right to have you service him.  He never promises that he will be exclusive to you, because if you deny him one day, he will find an alternative.

To him, it’s your fault if he cheats, because he just wants to have sex 24/7, if you cannot give him that, then he will definitely check elsewhere. Whether you do give in to his abnormal craving or you refuse to do so once in a while, he will never be satiated and you become his object of sexual satisfaction.

The Hot Guy

This one is just trouble waiting to happen. He may have impressed you with the nice suits, the gold watch, the perfect demeanor, but he knows that he is good-looking, if given a choice he would probably start dating himself. He wants everyone to worship the ground that he walks on.

He will not fail to remind you that you are privileged that he even chose to look at you twice. He is full of ego, higher than Mt. Everest. He may not even qualify to be a model, but ladies admire him from afar. Now that he is with you, he makes you know that if he asks you to jump, all you ask is, “How high?”

The Married Man


How many times should ladies be warned against this one? He has a wife, which he will NEVER leave, no matter how much he says that he loves you. remember, if he does not respect his marriage enough to be faithful to his current wife, and divorces her, he will not respect the marriage ( actually, the sham that it shall  actually be) he will soon have with you. When asked to choose between the wife and the mistress, believe me, men will more often than not going to choose the wife. It is tough and plain, but that is exactly the way things are.

The Commitment Phobic Man


This one is worse than shooting yourself in the leg. He is a smooth talker, but he is never going to go down the aisle. it is not the fact that he is gay or anything like that, but he is just not the serious type. he gets bored very easily.

I call it ” Relationship Attention Dysfunction Disorder” He stays just a little while, after the lady clearly likes him, is falling in love with him, he disappears.  He will promise heaven, but will, like my best friend loved saying, throw you out of a plane at 10,000 feet above sea level without a parachute expecting that you will be all fine and dandy.



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